The Bible is not just a historical textbook, a manual for a morally sound life, or a book of prophecies. It also contains important guidelines for mental health based on the principles of psychology God designed. Many Christians believe sin is the worst thing to happen to humanity, and they are wrong. Sin cut us off from God spiritually. But even worse is what caused Adam and many of his descendants to run away from God, physically and emotionally—and that is shame.
When people break away from God, whether by watering down their faith or abandoning religion altogether, they are sometimes surprised that they don’t feel guilt or shame about “sinning.” This is often true among Catholics, where guilt is used as the primary motivator to avoid sin. But there is no one coming out of the sky to judge you for your sins; the punishment is all within. The action of sin—hurting others, cheating, promiscuity, lying, etc—is not the problem they experience. What sin leaves behind, though, is weight. Every sin deposits moral weight your soul must carry. This weight is also known as shame. When we confess and repent to God, we turn over both our sins (the action) and our shame (what it left us with). Everyone sins one way or another, whether physically, emotionally or spiritually, and everyone must carry the shame that comes with it. But those who are in Christ are absolved of sin, and those who are emotionally free from within are absolved of shame. Christians seem to think it is automatic, that Jesus takes it all the moment you repent. But that is not true. He takes our sin and washes it white as snow. But our shame he cannot just take. We must release it from within. Shame becomes property of our souls; that is the way God designed it. In order to live in the fullness of God’s freedom, you must release the deposits of shame in your soul using the natural psychosomatic mechanisms God designed you with.
Most of this “moral weight” we experience as shame is unfortunately deposited into our souls before we turn seven years old. Every moment of our infancy and toddlerhood matters in the context of shame. It is the season of life where our “I am” beliefs develop. For example: I am bad, I am good, I am not good enough, I am alone, I am loved, I am safe, I am in danger, etc. Our I AM beliefs are proven to be the most impactful in the outcomes of our lives. Why? “I AM” is our connection to the Divine. I am is the power to create life and death that is within us (Proverbs 18:21) and it is how we exercise dominion over the earth (Psalm 8:6). God is the great I AM because his power infinitely exceeds any other power in the universe (Exodus 3:14). That does not render us powerless, though. We are his handiwork (Ephesians 2:10) and endowed with the same I AM power as he is.
“I am” beliefs are what make or break our quality of life. A man who grows up believing “I am a bad person, I am worthless, I am alone” is likely to hurt others or himself possibly resulting in death. A man who grows up believing “I am loved, I am important, I am intelligent” will have much to contribute to the world. The curse of sin means that all of our first “I ams” are out of our control; they are deposited into us by our parents and society. And, many of them are negative. When we grow up, we still have those I ams and we see their effects in our lives, if we take the time to become aware of them. Many people who are ashamed of themselves do not want to look within, which traps them perpetually. The pain of looking within feels too great. The fear of pain holds most people back from advancing past their childhood “I ams” which is why generational patterns of poverty, single parenthood, abuse and addiction continue.
To release shame, you must loosen the deposits of sin from your soul. When someone sins against you they leave deposits in your soul. Those deposits often fuel you to live in sin yourself, out of shame. Repent of your sin, and release your shame. I’ve already written a bit about releasing shame by facing and accepting yourself:
what’d you think?